Celebrating the 30 000th Blog Viewing

30 000th pageview was today!
Round figure ! ;) Caught my eyes :)

Today i came to a very profound self realisation

Is  not a thought, nor an opinion, nor a theory
is something i learned and i can count it as a means which has changed my vision of life

Since long
i had the impression
to be holding myself back

waiting for the ideal moment
waiting to improve and be even more perfect
so that i may be -finally- understood by some people

is like i took on me the burden
to be up to their image they wanted me to be
in a word trying to please them

but that was like always holding back my breath

today
after discussing a dream i had with a friend
i realised
there are some people we cannot save

at some point
i had started to please them
so i put on a burden which was not mine
this burden made me harder

exemple
is like when you have a rock on your back
and you are ascending a mountain
so even if the person next to you wants to chat with you
you will snap at him
as you are so much burdened already

so no time for such small talk
nor lightness

one day i heard
that enlightenemnt fruit
is also to realise
that actually
whatever happened in your life
was ok
things are just as they are

and they are good like that

trying and hoping hard to change people
are to bend ourselves to their cherished image they have projected on you
and what they want you to be

is something which is the real burden

if you let go of it
in a way
if you let go of trying to save them
or change them for their own good

then
you are happier
and you can chit chat with them
and just do the small talk they want
on a day to day basis

in a way
you surrender to the idea
that you can't do anything for them
you stop battling for this

because at some point
when i think about the fact
that we all die
what remains at this very time?
at your death bed?

is regrets
ah i should have been more loving
i should have been more kind
i should have been more lenient
and i should have let them be ignorant kids
at least i would have not wasted time from lack of human warmth
from lack of familial warmth
from lack of friendship warmth

cause in reality
a world is made of so many different people
if you try to be so picky
or if you try to shape them in your image
or if you let yourself being shaped into theirs

either you end up with a sour face
and a hardened heart

or

you become stupid ape
mimickeing all they want you to be

to be able to find the middle way
is to live among them
without being part of them

just to be able to Feel Life Warmth itself..

and of course the love we have for them
resurfaces
after we put it on hold..till we became better

so is best to forgive
and send them love

as i feel so much pity for them being ignorant
yet i know is like speaking to walls
they are -in a loving and non judgemental way- ignorant
impatient, and very much weak in truth

so the best thing you can do for a weed
is to give it love

Marrying a non realised person

If i can give a word of advice..
never ever a yogi woman should marry a non yogi

cause at some point
her shakti won't be able to compensate
for his non realised state

at best if she meditates
everyday and more than prior to her marriage
it ll stay AT BEST stable


but living
with a guy who meditates not
even prevent you to go to meditation group
or like not incense etc.

she will lose it within 2 or 3 years
and wonder why she married

well to statisfy her comfort zone
ok i know this guy since long
so let's marry and time to have kids

yet

all that counts when you die
is THE STATE in which you die

one better die
with a better state than prior to one coming into this world..

otherwise you will be slave to your dying state
and reincarnate
just worse
in most of cases

is tough for women
especially their friends should give the right advice

Girl i am your friend
and i advise you not to marry a guy who is not meditating
and if you married
and regret
well God will provide you for a better husband

but don't let your spirituality go down the drain

With Love
Petals

paris meditation - final

Yes now about my meditation
daily with a friend

we used to wake up at 630 every day
and get it right

the very first day
i felt a wind wooshing out of my head
was at the place of the limit between scalp and forehead
i was told is the virata

was amazing sound it made
wooshing out
like a fountain

the next days we did same

i even managed to feel so cool
that i had to take a shower to warm up...
feeling cool in winter time
i abhooooorr it

with indian blood
i have to move to south
or some warm country

can't get so coolnes topped with winter time


was great disciplined
maintained during a week


FIRST TIME EVER
I meditated with a yogi in morning
at a set time

EVEN when i lived in an ashram
NOT EVEN ONCE it happened
i was always meditating all alone

people should care for this GOOD old lady
she met mataji
and meditated by herself for SO LONG
30 years or so of meditation is NOT nothing

so some RESPECT SHOULD BE GIVEN TO HER

BUT most people make fun of her
WHICH IS REVOLTING TO ME

anyway
i had a GREAT TIME with her
meditation wise
otherwise she is a sincere lady
and has like anyone some ups and downs
but is her private life
not to be told here

anyway
a friend who was being bullied
by a group of singer
told me her hard time

so while was saying me this
i imagined she was singing on stage
and her kundalini shooting up

so much that light was emitted
and her so called singer ladies friends
saw it
and shut up

LOL
guess what next day she calls me
and say
hey you know what happened
a singer lady saw my kundalini while she was performing

hahaha
this is when i explained her
about the power of master
your life is liek a book
your erase what you want
and write what you want

call it my moment of insight!

ah yea
this morning as i was meditating
with my fiancé
aboutr 1h
i saw in vision at mid way of meditation
 that an angel all golden
was having an arrow pointed at the moon
and i looked at moon
then he moved clockwise to the starts and i followed it
and at the end he pointed at me

wowhahahaha

LATER
i realised hey !
is like abraham story
he looked at moon and stars seeking god
and at the end he found it!!!!
was INSIDE


HEY WHO KNOWS
I WILL FIND MY OWN FULL ENLIGHTENMENT SOON!!!



kiss