The Present Light

after my meditation

as i was looking at the keyboard
it felt light was coming out of it

then on the spot i realised
it is not light coming out of the present keyboard itself

but it was because i was in the present
meaning that
i was not identifying myself in that very present moment
with any other thing than the Present itself

thus the Present itself
is Pure Light

for if i was identifying myself with some
past or future thoughts
then de facto i would not have been present

yet, what is the Present?

if not that which is Eternal
i.e. in the manifestation (outward/out of ourselves world that one can see with our eyes)
the Light itself.

for in the Present
inside we are One with our Light
and its projection
meaning what we can see in our outside world in that very moment
is also reflecting this light
while wearing different form.

so it is not the light coming out of the stuff around me in the present
but it is only my own inner light
that i could see outside of me
for the outside is only the inside but wearing/experimenting varieties of other forms.

One thought and One emotion at a time

I found a thing

it is said that we can use our power best
if we use ONE thought and One Emotion
at a time

so there was an insect flying in the room
so i raised energy
and put my attention on it only
so it makes one thought

and one emotion
so i felt joy for that very attention of mine (who was the insect)
if the insect would remain stuck up there and move no more

yes!
it hit me,
the attention is not ON the insect outward
the attention IS FEELING inside
how joyous i would feel FEELING the insect stuck up there

so it is as if the attention was the insect !

therefore i understand
this is why the awareness is ALL that around
for the awareness is aware/witness of EACH SINGLE THOUGHT

and the insect is BASICALLY A THOUGHT - MATERIALISED!

therefore ONE thought
and ONE feeling OF it

equals you are it inside
and can have power on your "self"

this is WHY there are this picture
about the awakening with multiple eyes

for it means
ALL the thoughts that one is AWARE of,
is the COMPLETE awareness

what i have learned

before i had doubts
even with sufism

because i knew not what is Truth
i knew not how could i trust

with a spontaneous awakening
and feeling of cool breeze
stemming from inside

i knew it was not controlled
from outside

therefore
it was mine
uncontrolled
neither by someone nor by my ego

but i wanted more
a new change
for Truth brings change

because if you don't change for the better
than you stay in same situation in your life
not evolving
and turning in circle
with the same "issues"
more or less worsening

so i learned it was about taking charge of one's own life
the cool breeze is the manifestation
that the inner divine energy
pushes upwards
at heart level take the spirit
and bring it upwards
above head
above thoughts
and thus liberates you from your bonding
of identification with your own thoughts

above thoughts
is pure silence

once liberated
we have space
space to create what we wish for

therefore each person should seek for what
his or her pure desire it
to allow it to be manifested

the more more thoughtless awareness
the more silence
the more silence, the more emptiness

and when ONE thought with ONE emotion
is placed in this shrine of silence
encircled by emptiness

then this ONE thought
becomes empowered
and is manifested

for power before
ALSO existed
but used to be divided by different thoughts
when divided so much, quota of power per thought is weak

but one thought one power
is a powerful condition for your desire to become real

thus you are your own master
at last free to experience what you wish
which is no more illusive daily striving.

but if you trust not
this spirit inside
which is the container of the Pure Love

then you cannot gamble your Life
for a new change
for letting it take a new turn
and  become first

transformed by Love
and then, become itself Love

once it is Love
it is actually a level of manifesation of this Pure Awareness/Silence the spirit is brought in

for in vibration
Peace is above Love

and i guess above Peace
are new levels
for Face of God
shines ever day into a NEW splendor
as there is NO limit to GOD

but if one takes not this turn for Pure Love in life
then, there is no more space
for the Pure Desire for Love
to transform us

and as God forces not

one has no more natural ground to live
for Pure Desire cannot be removed.

This is why
no conditioning

even be it the apparent ultimatum of Quran 
given by ignorant people 

see the scene :

 As the battle continued, Malik al-Ashtar fought his way through the opposing army until he was two rows away from Mu'awiyah's tent.^[5][7] Only two rows away from killing Mu'awiyah and ending the war. However, a situation occurred. Mu'awiyah wanted to trick Imam Ali's army to stop fighting and disunite them by creating confusion. So he asked Amr ibn al-As, who told him, "I'm sure we can cheat them with the Qur'an."^[8] Mu'awiyah loved the idea and ordered his soldiers to place the Quran on their spear.^[4][5] When most of the soldiers of Imam Ali saw this they stopped fighting. Though Imam Ali knew that it was a trick by Mu'awiyah to create confusion and disunity, he told his army "It's a trick! I was the first to invite them to Allah's Book. And I was the first to believe in it. They've disobeyed Allah and broken His promise." (this is referring to the negotiation/persuading process before the war)^[5] Imam Ali wanted his soldier to continue fighting because they were so close to victory. Despite Imam Ali's effort, 22,000 soldiers of Imam Ali disobeyed his commands and said "Stop fighting and order al-Ashtar to withdraw!"^[5] Knowing that his own soldiers had turned their backs on him and a few group of true believers, Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib told his soldiers to command Malik to return for safety reasons.^[4] The messenger gave Malik the order. Even though, Malik knew that he has the opportunity to end the war and rid the world of Ma'uwiyah, he stopped and returned.^[4][5] Malik said "If Ali ibn Abi Talib orders something, I have to return".^[7] This moment was a defining moment in Malik's life because it shows his discipline and submission to Imam Ali Ibn Abi Talib.


Quran ties people in fear - that's a trick
Quran cannot be understood by mind, but by heart.

while Truth is Spiritual and ever preached,
few can hear it,
to be led to Victory

source : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malik_al-Ashtar



nor the outwards play of power can deter the Truthful people :

see the scene :
 

Their enmity and open threats of a breach between Abu Talib's clan, the Banu Hashim and the rest of the Banu Quraish distressed Abu Talib who was aware of the cost that his nephew Muhammad had to pay if deserted . Abu Talib sent for Muhammad and told him the news, "Spare me and yourself and put not burden on me that I can’t bear". Muhammad thought that his uncle would let him down and would no longer support him, so he replied:

"O my uncle! by God if they put the sun in my right hand and the moon in my left on condition that I abandon this course, until God has made me victorious, or I perish therein, I would not abandon it." Muhammad got up, and as he turned away, his uncle called back and then said "Go and preach what you please, for by God I will never forsake you.". Abu Talib then recited two lines of verse with meanings of full support to Muhammad.

source : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_and_third_deputation_with_Abu_Talib

Moon is the Left channel in our subtle system in our body
Sun is the Right channel

even if ALL kinds of Power of BOTH channels were given to Muhammad (peace be upon him)
he would have NEVER abandon Truth, which is in the CENTRAL CHANNEL, the Middle Path (ehdina sirah tal mustaqim = the straight path) for any other manifestation of power.
He stood his Ground.

for ONLY the middle channel opening leads to Victory.

and Victory is in Surah Fatah ( Chapter of Victory) in quran,

Fatah, with the sound Fa, means the Opening ,
like the opening of a seed

or like in surah Falak (the day break)
the cleaving of the seed which leads to see the light

and this cleaving is that of your Inner Energy
which pierces your fontanel area
and brings you to Light
while before you were closed into an egg/seed/ darkness

nor could ever make a true seeker of Truth waver 

see the scene.

Heart being capable of All Form of love
is not a poetic moving wish of ibn Arabi

it is LITERALLY the HAPPENING
THE VICTORY talked of above

for it is when the Kundalini takes your spirit
Above your thoughts
thoughts are mental FORMS

and once your are ABOVE those mental forms
you are in the PURE AWARENESS which is the ONLY state
where your Heart can be capable of ALL forms of LOVE.


for Love is the Meaning of Life
and without Love Life is no naturally no more.

so unless you already know what you desire
and that desire be your DRIVE

and unless you test your belief
to see if this belief feeds you and quench your thirst
for Life, Love, God

you will never find Certainty.

For finding ever fresh and renewed Life
is finding God
finding this constant Pure Love in continuous way
is finding God

and finding God
is finding Certainty

Finding Love is finding Certainty.
For the Constant Presence of Love felt on your path, is the Proof of you having found God inside you.
it is the proof of you being finally fed by your Pure Desire.
Therefore, your life will naturally flow and go on.

for God is not outside
it is the REAL YOU inside

the HU (arabic meaning WHO HE IS)
and the real Eternal Life in you

is the SPIRIT

whose manifestation at heart level is LOVE
and above thought is PEACE

and above is as far as you can go.

Natural Drive

if there is no more drive
then self obviously

the inner life can no more flow

and when the river is no more
life is no more.

Reality of heaven and hell

what is Reality?

even the word Reality is not really true, real i.e. rightly understood by us

i never was religious from the beginning,
but spiritual
by then i had no clue that even the word spiritual existed

i only knew that i liked to discover inner beauties
as if i was literally uncovering lid fro a can

so when i went on an islamic forum
and saw so much division
that hit me
for i never thought that division in what is called the last and completed religion existed

so i declared by then,
that God does not takes side even if it is called islam
but protects Truth

this i was innerly sure of,
it was a sure shot

innerly i felt disconnected with the inner touch
when i met a sort of muslim teacher

who was so much more in touch with quran
that i wanted to follow the quranic teaching

but the thing is
people knows more the letter of it
than the spirit of it

from that time i lost touch with my inner self
and that used to be soft

once i tried to be "honest"
i felt it was impossible to practice religion
and i felt my heart became hard

somehow i met a sufi group
so that was the spirituality i was always attracted with

that time was really particular
for i was so much in touch with my inner world of dreams and visions

this was a total mind blowing experience

for it opened a door to perception
to right perception on some regards

and that is :
hell and heaven exist
right now

as said in the Constantine movie :

 John Constantine: But when you cross over time stops. Take it from me, two minutes in hell is a lifetime. When I came back I knew all the things I could see were real. Heaven and hell are right here. Behind every wall, every window. The world behind the world, and we're smack in the middle. 

watching this movie
when i heard Heaven and Hell are right here

it reminded me my own dreams and visions in that period of my life

the new breakthrough by then in my life
was to really understand
that Heaven and Hell are NOW and NOT later, not once we are dead we go to heaven and hell

i can related to the muslims reading that
for each single counter truth i may seem to say
because i went through them all

it can be proven 
by simple logic 
in hadith is it not said 
the way we die is the way we are raised up?

if we die as a believer we are raised as such in heaven 
if we die as a disbeliever we are raised as such in hell

because our last moment is NOT a moment OUT of Time
it is NOT to come

it is ALREADY there!
by the very choices we do in the now and then
we choose either to take the PATH leading to heaven 
or the PATH leading to hell

and the PATH itself is heaven if we die on it
or the path itself is hell if we die on it

as in the hadith of the guy 
who chose to show abnegation to God to be forgiven
after having killed so many people
he died while travelling to a saint place

and while he was half way between the heaven and hellish place
angels of both sides fought to know who shall get his soul
and finally due to his INTENTION set 
God shortened the path to heaven for him
thus he was counted among the heavenly ones

so it is true 
each of our decisions and choices BUILD up to our heaven or hell 
and NOT as to COME 
but as IS.

heaven and hell are ON THE SPOT
it is NEVER after

the word HEREAFTER - Akheera 
means MORE than the english image of hereafter 
we misunderstand it as AFTER the NOW

just by browsing on net one can already find  this :

f. akrabajamaa , utani % ukoo.} 
Ahora. n. and Akhera, Aheri, 
(i) that \vhuh is last (or behind, 
or beyond), the end, the last stage; 
(a) cs'i world, fun 

source : https://archive.org/stream/swahilienglishdi00madauoft/swahilienglishdi00madauoft_djvu.txt

Akheera with the meaning of LAST, as in LAST stage , that which is BEHIND or BEYOND the seen

like in the prayer of the Prophet :

Allah shows me things as they REALLY ARE.

it is because by then in his time

people went out of sheer period of ignorance

hardly learning that one should should not stone to death baby girls

so how could, except for a few, on a mass scale, higher level consciousness be taught to 

people who were so much LOW in their mind

by the way, this is why the prophet said in his last sermon 

report my worlds to next generation 

for they may understand more/better.

!

it is about understanding more deeply WHEN you ASCEND as SOUL 

and your consciousness is raised from lower to HIGHER worlds of understanding!

another word for low is the root word of Dunia 

muslims takes too narrow mindedly the meaning of dunia

i know because i went through it

dunia is seen as the life on this earth

that one should shun 

so that one reap all for the akeehra in the after life after death

but dunia is NOT this world 

dunia is the LOWER part of this world/time

how can time be LOW 

when this very time can be your savior?

Daani', which literally something which is low, lowly, insignificant, 

something of inferior value

source : islamhelpline.net  

so the lower aspect of this life, 

in another word, lower consciousness is this dunia

but if you ASCEND, i.e. do the Miraaj as the prophet did, 

as you are supposed to work for it in ramadan 

then, you can LIVE in this world without being part of the dunia

this is why in a hadith

it was said of a man who came with his ablution water dripping from his face

that he is from the people of heaven (prophet saying)

while other companions of prophets 

tried to see lol by stalking him all day long or week long what he did for that 

what extra prayer he did

and finally as they found not

they asked him please tell us 

and he said

i do nothing

except that i forgive those who hurt me

and how could he be SEEN as HE REALLY IS ON THE SPOT 

as a person of heaven?

because heaven was HIS STATE in the NOW

and how he went to heaven ?

by forgiving constantly 

so, 

when keanu reeves said : 

hen I came back I knew all the things I could see were 
real. Heaven and hell are right here. Behind every wall, every window. 
The world behind the world, and we're smack in the middle. 

that is all true!

by then, 

when i used to see heavenly like pictures

because i was more in a temporary state of goodness

i used to be so happy

as if i was in another world though living in this one

but when i had constrained myself by attaching myself to 

self reproach, guilt and sorrow

i saw literally speaking hell

felt it 

and when i used to got up from these nightmares

i could still feel scorch on the skin, if i had been hurt during it.

it is ONLY because of the awakening of the cool breeze

that i started to learn to LET GO and FORGIVE myself.

our own body will become heaven or hell

by the way we choose to address ourselves 

yes the way we address others is the way we address ourselves ON THE SPOT

it is not a far off connection

for i learned a few weeks ago

that if i hit my foot 

the nerves got shocked and the hurt ascended up the spine!

therefore back got hurt! though there is no apparent link between a foot and back hurt! 

and i understood 

1-the meaning of resonating - we, being a resonator 

2-the meaning of extending limbs 

such as 

if foot hurt lead me to accumulated in my spine, nervous system the hurt felt 

then what about my hands when they give hurt to someone else?

it means , that me too i accumulated inside of me ON THE SPOT the hurt i am sending out

by extension i am the Beauty i recognise and give to others

and the hellfire that i nourish in acting so towards others and thus myself.

it is the FIRST time i REALLY lived the experience of 

the OTHER as YOURSELF

by the way :)

did you know that Keanu (Reeves) means in Hawaii language "the cool breeze over the Mountain"!:)

Bad Mood

i had a real bad mood yesterday

the thing with bad mood
is that you WANT TO STAY WITH IT
as looooooooooooooong as it takes

and then, had i had my fiancé in front of me
i would have smashed his head

lol
hehehe

so,
having a bad mood is OK
actually it is important to avoid it
  

however..is also important to see,,who is watching the bad mood,,?..


is the witness
is the arising and passing away..of mental citta factors
(citta = is our attention, the mental + emotional sides)

if you do NOT do it on the spot..you CAN get stuck on bad citta

this is WHY i was SO MUCH ENGROSSED in that BAD MOOD
that i did not want to calm down
for i had taken it as MY ID by then, so much i identified myself with it


and why it was so?
because i refused to meditate..while in the BAD mood..to ,,see,, the mood

so meditation ON THE SPOT
allow us to SEE ourselves, here to see my bad mood

but true, 
who wants to SEE that which is bad? 
i prefer on the spot to have a fighting character 
a real bad one
instead of seeing it passing 

which means
preferring to identify more and more with it by allowing time to pass like that
instead of seeing it passing!

that is so stupid of me
hopefully 
next time i will raise my energy ON THE SPOT
to SEE the state of emotions i am IN

so that it JUST be a PASSING thing 
as it was MEANT TO BE

and NOT something sticky lol



     

Boredom

i realised that actually i feel bored
when things goes into routine
and seems no more working

and i had forgotten!
that joy is the key

JOY/Love is the ONLY power
that works

which means
if i do something
without joy then it will bear no fruits

this means NOT to submit to the task like a slave
and call it joy
or force joy upon myself

this means to INITIATE a VERSION of that task
in MY MIND that would BRING JOY
and eventually i could FEEL JOY in my heart

this changes everything

so now, lol
i took part in a game to win a week end somewhere in some castle

so what i did
is first i imagined myself at this place
wondered FIRST
WHAT joy is close to this scene to me

so for me
it was the stone of the castle
i like the touch of it

the wind of the place
that gives sensation of freedom up high
a castle up high on a cliff

and under the sea
the waves sound is fabulous

and of course
a good green forest nearby
to feel refreshed in the morning

while having my breakfast in the garden!

;)
as i felt the joy of the version of the scene
then, i let it go
in the silence


i have to win !
for otherwise why i would have felt the joy?

if i felt it, then it is real

it is JUST the timing of it
that i am not in control of

as i have been told
you do your share : the WHAT
and let GOD care for the : WHEN (why, who etc.)

The Spirit

i had today a nice dream

ah that was beautiful and glorious
i saw the spirit
raising like a huge flame
and it raised in front of shri mataji who was next to me

and he raised so that she too recognises its grandeur   
as she did, she bowed to it 

i liked that

that was truly real scene for the word Glory

now somehow i will do what i can, to get this too   

i have to , because this kind of glory i have never seen it in daily life
i just wish dream does not faint in my mind otherwise i forget my drive  
out of boredom at times

(why?
cf next post)

it was beautiful 

because when i look at it again
first, nothing else existed in the attention 
except 

only this great and i don t know for what reason, beautiful flame it was, rising

third it was really powerful and especially superior on its own

and when i look back at it , there is no question rising or doubts if it was good or not and to what limit

i can breathe well