Effie Gray

 

Portrait made of John Ruskin by his protege the painter John Everett Millais.

In the movie Effie Gray, 

at the very beginning, the teacher John tells his students

that Nature should be painted as it is seen

the good and the bad that occur 

they must be true to their observation.

Later, the painter John E. Millais

happens to be hired to paint the portrait of John Ruskin

as he fell in love with his wife.

The interesting part is 

when one wants to win 

one truly does its best to look good

either by shining one's own qualities 

and/or by degrading the competition.

According to me, the student surpassed the master

as he remained true to his self

by honouring and painting what he saw 

not letting temptation of sabotaging his master's portrait becoming his goal.

Instead he made sure to paint his master as is

doing so, he did not darkened his heart with a goal that was not his.

His initial goal was to become a recognised painter and for this you need to be true to your learning.

Therefore if you are true to your initially set goal

which is your heart desire

and do not forget it 

do not exchange it for some other secondary goal, say revenge

then your gain is the ultimate gain

this is the real success

as you followed the light of your heart

in the service of the fulfilment of your goal/heart desire.

Ironically; the same teacher fell short of his own teaching

as he refused to accept his wife as it is

due to his own fears - whatever fears he had.

From a deep and exalted love and devotion he had for his by then future wife

once married he let this being compromised

because of his inability to face his own fears 

and contrary to his teaching 

instead of seeing things for what they are 

and painting his own life with what he had

he preferred to give into his fears, denials, covering up his own weaknesses 

which his own self loathing ended up being directed towards his wife

who started leaving a life of an "eternal torment"

Effie's mother happened to lose at least 7 kids

and Effie's husband made fun of that barnyard who should not be at this point distressed..

Anyway the fun part is once Effie remarried

she ended up having 8 babies

Definitely the souls of the lost ones 

must have reincarnated by her

I couldn't prevent myself of having that thought.

All in all, though the movie could have been more expressive in exploring these aspects

it was yet an honourable take.

May be the deep silence and the gravity displayed by all the actors was enough of a silent talk 

pointing at these very emotions.

Feedback and not failure

 To be in charge if your own Life.

Fears take control of our life 

when we believe they are in control.

This happen due to a panic reaction.

So what should be done

is to take what we do not like

as a feedback.

Instead of taking it as a failure, 

ie failure, because it did not turn out to be as we expected.

Failure is only if you label it so.

This is the power of the words,

the spell-ing.

So take it as a feedback.

Then, integrate it in your field.

Imagine your field being your body

it has like any organism to grow

we grow either through our own choices, stepping ahead to accomplish something - joy

or forced by pain

either way to make our field grow.

The growth of this field happens 

once we learn to integrate the feedback to our field

call it magnetic field

it'll grow like a cellular division that gives a foetus.

So this feedback will integrate our field

like a cell 

and will grow

and be part of us.

For this to happen

we need to pluck that feedback 

like a flower

and give it love

look at it with innocent observation 

with the unique objective of reaching our set goal.

Attention is the wave and the particle

 Important thing about the agnya

the attention should be seen like a particle of light

that hit the object

and return to us its wave

to be stored into our ego or superego.

By the way, that pretty much answer the 

question if the atom is a light or a particle, honestly.

Back to the main point, 

therefore, the intent behind the attention 

is that which you reap for yourself.

Intent, judgement that hit the objects by a loaded attention

will return you back a wave that would be quite asymmetric.

such as fear, and other imbalances, judgement and other imbalances.

Example: You see someone doing something funny

you instantly judge it

and that data returns back to you and is stored in your system.

No harm there.

Yet, next time you want to take part in say a talk,

you will feel fear of being laughed at; that is stored in your system

through your previous experience.

You are judged by which you judge.

So this is why the letting go is a key element in our attention.

As a human being, we cannot suppress such hasty judgement,

but as a work in progress, we can remember to forgive, ie let go of the embedded judgement 

in our attention,

so that in the future, the attention be so bright, liberated, unloaded, that we just are in the moment,

and just enjoying the moment.

The whole purpose of life

is to remember our Divinity; how we are the expression of it

and also to embody it to help others to remember theirs too.

Isn't it paradoxical on one hand to pretend that, 

on the other hand to see same people feeling envious, jealous,

and. thus not wishing the good for the others that they have been asserting as philosophy of their life before.

This point I never got it.

I had definitely felt these feelings too

but. again; how long do you stay with them?

You can let them be passing shades 

or become your fossilised identities.

Kundalini Fire at Agnya & Computer Download

Amazing happening 

Yesterday night

all of sudden I got awake

and as soon as I opened my eyes

I got an intense extremely quick flash of light

it was all red in my vision in the background.

And then there were a non stop succession 

of rapidly scrolling images on top of that 

I would say may be thousands of them!

I couldn't even see the images, so fast the speed was!

It was like thousands of computer files being downloaded!!

Impossible to have time to view one single image

so incredibly fast that download was..

This lasted at least 15 to 20sec (?) or less or more

no idea but that was my first time having such experience.

After this I could also feel electricity going down towards the heart 

due to me going back to sleep there were couple of occurrences 

where I could feel this electric activity 

I even saw myself sending messages lol on WhatsApp 

and then once I woke up I did not see any message sent 

and got panicked what if I had sent them to the wrong person 

describing the happening!

Anyway at this point, dream and reality were one I believe.

Luckily, nothing sent in the middle of the night hahaha

but the senses were for sure extremely heightened after that during the sleep.

The spirit explained that the red background I saw was the Kundalini Fire

and that is very rare to see that 

as very few people have seen it

also the images were all of my past and future

and I could see them, as the Kundalini passed through the Agnya.

Now that I think of it,

it is true that Shri Mataji explained 

that thoughts are like waves 

and when kundalini passes through Agnya 

it straightened the waves!

Also it makes even more sense

when you are your thoughts

you are into them

meaning you are identified with them.

How ?

it is like when you are riding a car

you cannot see the car from the outside.

This is the most close example, I can come up with the thoughts identification.

If you are identified with your thoughts,

you are in them

you can't see them

meaning you can't observe them from the outside

only then you see that for what they are

and are not limited or confined by them 

so here in my nightly explosive computer download 

I'll call it so

thoughts, of the past and the future where seen, from the exterior.

And this time, 100% seen from the exterior, as in pure awareness.

First point being; the pure Awareness of my own thoughts - which I experienced.

The second point, I'd like to highlight is the Power.

That is a mix of electric feel - no element of pain involved - with the sensation that it is so vast and alive.

Incredibly enough, in it located in a human being!

what a hidden wonder!

Lol a bitliek Dr Who phone box, where the inside is bigger than the outside.

No wonder that a human being in full power 

would be more powerful than any nuclear technology.

The third point I'd like to mention

is it is independent from you, the you as your usual day to day self.

so it is indeed a power that is in you and yet not dependant of you, the personality

while being the true you at the same time.

So the only part is the mastery of awareness that is missing.

Once you are freed from the bondage of your thoughts,

then with that Risen Power

where you direct you awareness, 

you can direct and move mountain of power I feel.

I think this is the meaning of reference by Jesus 

when he said you can move mountains if you have faith.

and faith should be understood as a Being in you

to have Faith

is to have the Kundalini Awakened

Once you have it Arisen 

like in Quran in chapter Muzzamil

it says O you enshrouded; Arise in the Night

The meaning in that verse is the command to the Kundalini to be cultivated 

at night 

the vigil at night 

will help it arise

you can't force a seed to arise 

you need to make it grow by watering it 

same here.

Also, the redness of the vision

reminded me of Surah Ar Rahman 

1. When the sky is rent asunder, and it becomes red like ointment:
2. Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?

This verse came up in my mind.

One should understand that scriptures are meant as a coded text for all levels

from the average man understanding to metaphors which height matches the height/source of revelation.

So it would be unnecessarily fussy to explain the meaning to masses

and nor would it serve any purposes as even then it has to be experienced.

So no point in talks.

Scriptures are also more like rain that water your breakthrough

and also a roadmap to check where you are going through.

Lady Fatima (pbuh)

In the little fire lit house I could see Fatima (pbuh)

it was said "She is not the Queen of Heaven for nothing".

Though her destiny was to marry Ali (pbuh),

Had she not guarded her virginity by being cautious of the man/suitor who presented himself 

in front of her door

the marriage with Ali would not have materialised.

She kept the door shut to him.

From there the lesson that applies is that spiritual people 

should guard their spirituality

when at their door any worldly suitor shows up.

Spiritual people marry the heavenly chosen one,

and guarding one's innocence is one's own responsibility 

till the promised auspicious match happen.

Going for a person who does not cultivate what I would. call an earthly marriage, 

however nice the person is, would be signing one's own spiritual death.

Kiss