The Void

AHAAAA!!!!


is the extract of the article i was reading :

The importance of recognizing a particular void

If he aspires to free himself from the prison of his tiny, illusory mental world, the seeker must arrive at recognizing in himself a very particular Void — which, contrary to what the common run of humankind can imagine, is not nothingness, but constitutes, in fact, his Primordial Essence —, so that, after long and tenacious meditation practice as well as spiritual exercises carried out in different life situations, he succeeds to remain in this state after his physical death, without dreading this condition of being in which he is going, inevitably, to find himself at this monumental instant.

Because of its major importance for the aspirant, it is necessary to return once again to the fact that this Void, or “Shunyata” as it is called in India, consists in fact of a very particular form of consciousness which has no common measure with the ordinary consciousness in which human beings generally pass their life. It is an Immaculate Consciousness of the highest subtlety which constitutes the very Essence of all beings, as well as an inviolable sanctuary in which the seeker can take refuge, not only during the time allowed him to live in this turbulent world, but also after his corporeal death.

Physically, it is impossible for him to escape from the force of gravity which, from his birth, has not ceased to be at work, pulling him ever downwards, until the day when, by an inexorable law which governs the whole of the manifest world, he finally loses his body. But, as previously said, he can escape psychically from this descending force — in so much as he dedicates his life to this end.

Since this form of existence is destined from the outset to be only temporary, should not one in this case infer that it is precisely what awaits the human being after the dissolution of his earthly body that proves to be the most important thing? 

 source : http://www.meditation-presence.com/en/articles/bardo-thodol

THAT IS THE VOID or SPACE as i called it 

i had seen in my dream when i was finishing my studies

i had seen 
that i was giving a Gift Box

and the dark blue wrapper in it 

had on it the Beautiful Names of God/Allah

and it was being rolled by the Wind

and i was going after it 

and IN THE VERY GIFT BOX

i put my hands 

and is something i could not touch 

it was LIKE A DARK MIST

LIKE SPACE

OR VOID

something you cannot touch

but was immense or profound

though contained in a gift box

the Sufi at that time

was very happy when i told him 

about this

of course 

he could not manage 

to tell me something i could not 

grasp about my own Essence 

i suppose

hence i had still no interpretation 

but the second dream i had 

and had shared as well on this blog

was about the Emptiness that i dreamt of 

a good 6months ago

and which was not empty actually

but FULL

these both aspects 

i find are being hit on the nail

in this article

great writer

plus i love his explanation of Gravity

that you cannot escape it

to the extent of your upward effort 

i.e. to ascend

is just terrible 

even the numbnuts i meet

are making all efforts 

for all kinds of stuff 

EXCEPT FOR SOME ASCENDING STUFF

anyway 

may be i was born 

by mistake on this Earth

or may be i came at a real bad timing 

cause REALLY 

STUPIDITY AT ITS HIGHEST

i see 90% of time 

in those who call themselves 

spiritual 

ahhh... so frustrating

anyway

always refreshing to read such article

at least 

i get reassured

there are some good guys

kiss

Personal Note..

PERSONAL NOTE..

NEVER ever
and i SAY EVER

SHOLTEEEEE!! go for a walk
when it rains!!!

unless i want to catch cold ...

Magic

There is no stronger magic than longing

Agnya

it just hit me!

when the agnya expands
actually.. it is dissolving
as it is no more tightening the both channel passage there

no?

in that case

is good!

as agnya has taken such a bad connotation

now if i say
agnya expands
prejudice lead you to think
ok the ego is getting worse

no..actually
if agnya , which is an ENERGY center, EXPANDS

then it is dissolving the individuality into a greater space
like universe etc

i think  this is right

Synchronicities today

hmm i am assaulted with synchronicities
today it seems

in the new city i moved to
i happened to think
about horse riding

and guess what?
right 2min after
behind a bush
i saw the tail of grey horse

i blinked eyes
many times to be sure
am not hallucinating

cause was the city
and a horse near car park
is a no no

LOL
so i quickened the pace
and saw it was indeed a GREY HORSE!!!

likewise
there were such small occurances today

but the one now i saw
is that i received a mail
with the jewellers name
being
"BLUE PEARLS"

while i was again thinking
5 min ago
about the Blue Pearl

it is popping out
of an invisible web
and saying "hello! am there"

is funny?!

i even thought
the horse popped out of
a parallel reality
breaking out the web
hahaha

actually ... i should have asked hm?

update : and now i received an email
from a Blue Star?? what's the heck there?

Giving Birth to your Soul

Again
today i switched on TV
and again it hit me
as it was confirming my own thoughts...


cause lately as i was remembering
about soul

i remembered to have seen in a vision
4 years ago
how Soul was a ball of light in my belly
and if necessary practice was not done
it just get drawn ..

like in black seas

actually
this is how i understand
even better Quran
which is mostly about such metaphors

and with the awakening of kundalini
i understood that
actually my soul
arises
as said in Quran too
"Arise"

through It
and join back the Spirit
its Source

so as i remembered
patchworking my visions about soul

i remembered to have seen
as if i was being born
remembering the stage of delivery

so lately
i realised  innerly

that is like my soul
is the baby to be born
and that is actually what i want

people do have children
but is not what i want
what i want is to give birth
to my Own Soul

as if it was a baby
and actually it is
this is what is to be born again

and shockingly
is what i concluded out of intuition

but as soon as i switched on TV
in a movie!
the guy was saying

"i feel the true message of Jesus
is that life after life when we reincarnate
we learn to give birth to our soul..."

Jesus!
i said!

is the TV a human being?
it starts chit chatting with me now? hmm?

actually is the best confirmation i ever get
cause is like you give birth to Eternal Life
when you decide to give birth to your Soul
for Real

and when you think about it
Mary giving birth to Jesus
was exactly this very action
to be taught as a metaphor
for human being

that
you are giving birth
to your own divine Light

and is nothing about God in flesh to be worshiped
or to worship some photo
or some statue
or some imaginary God

is about completing your trust
that God has given you
as your True Light in your soul
to which you give the Right to be born

is to actualise your divine Nature
then you become a Real Human Being
who becomes Immortal
i feel

The Blue Star

Yesterday
after meditation
i saw in a vision
the universe

in the outer space
i saw a bunch of blue shining stars

and the Voice of Spirit said
"I will show you the most beautiful stars"

and right after this vision
i (not my mental but was the real me)
answered by word and in image

"I let go"

and the image of it
was the wind that was taking away
the pink cherry blossom petals
swaying them away

the last vision represents
the temporal nature of things
which are born and die
like waves of sea arising and dying again

so is only on the spot
that you occupy yourself with
the new situation
after you let go

and you start a new life
afresh

yes...so nostalgic of my movie
it is what it was also teaching in it

i think is the most complete movie
about Life i have ever seen...sigh..

and like in my movie
i saw a blue star shining
i was fascinated by it

and that vision followed up
later the spirit told me
that the stars are realised being
that are alive
and have their own consciousness

see now even TV and movies talk to me..
once were birds
when they were chirping
i was hearing them speaking as a human being

by the way
this is the secret of languages

is not languages that are incomprehensible
is the shrinking of our consciousness that made us divided
and not understanding the others' language/dialect

cause the life that is running in your vein
is just your consciousness expanded there..

imagine
the day your consciousness expands so much..
that you can actually not only see outer space
like i did in my vision as a token of certitude
but you can INFUSE other creation and stuff
with your consciousness...

imagine, the possibilities...
this is not magic or witch power lol
is ignorant people who fear who say that

it is merely your own consciousness expanding
and when you infuse
say
the mountain over there
with your consciousness
you can make it move..

HOW?

as much as
you can make your arm move..
cause it has been infused with your consciousness

so the body of human being
is just meant to be a starting point
for experiencing life outside of it
by letting it go
outward
and expand

back to the Blue Star :

 the Blue Star represents the Blue Pearl of the Agnya
which expanded and allowed you to see the vision of the Universe for real

and i had indeed no clue about Blue Pearl
i was just getting in touch with my Soul after meditation

and this is what i found about it :
Following article source : http://www.newcenturyfoundation.org/blue-pearl-the-jewel-of-enlightenment/

The Blue Pearl ~ the Jewel of Enlightenment

[The following is one of three short talks delivered by Lao Gan Ma at The Phoenix Rising Experience on September 11, 2010 in Marin County. Each talk served as an introduction to the performances that followed.]

The Jewel of Enlightenment

A long time ago, the Divine Mother proph­e­sied that a time will come when two dragons battle each other for supremacy in the world: the Black Dragon whose nega­tive energy emanates anger, fear, doubt and greed, and the White Dragon whose posi­tive energy emanates faith, courage, wisdom, compas­sion and Pure Love.
It will be a time when deliv­ering real dharma is extremely difficult.
It will be a time when many things are on fire.
It will be a time when the Divine Mother appears in the form of the Phoenix – the Garuda – and flies through the world holding the auspi­cious Blue Pearl – the jewel of Enlightenment – in its beak — bringing peace, hope and joy to a reborn and healed world.
That time is now – the 21st Century.
So, what is this Blue Pearl, this Lan zhenzhu?
Wher­ever there is the union of purity and depth we find the color blue. The oceans are blue. The sky is blue. The largest animal, the blue whale — a messenger of ancient wisdom, is blue. The Medi­cine Buddha is blue. Krishna, Vishnu and Rama are blue.
The Blue Pearl is the power of infi­nite Love and infi­nite Compassion.
Love that is Pure and unconditional.
Compas­sion whose foun­da­tion is wisdom. Compas­sion without wisdom is simply kindness.
Awak­ening the Blue Pearl releases nega­tive emotions and opens our heart to the energy of Enlightenment.
In Chinese the words “busy” and “angry” are each made up of two char­ac­ters. “Busy” trans­lates as “heart-dying” and “angry” trans­lates as “heart-enslaved.” Think about that.
Though the Blue Pearl’s Love and Compas­sion are infi­nite, it is wise to remember that time is finite. There­fore, we should always keep the lesson of imper­ma­nence close to our heart – there is no time to waste.
The Blue Pearl is the Most Precious Jewel.
To the Divine Mother — Guan Yin – who holds the Blue Pearl – the Soul of all sentient beings — We are the Most Precious Jewel. How pure, how magical, how beau­tiful. This is a Divine Blessing.
The Blue Pearl is the vehicle of Guan Yin’s teach­ings. To Guan Yin, all crea­tures, even those we perceive as the most nega­tive, have Buddha nature within. The Blue Pearl is a reflec­tion of our Inner God Nature – our Enlightenment. When our forms pass away, the Soul becomes a blue light – a Blue Pearl.
Always remember who you are.
The Blue Pearl has Magical Power.
The Magical Power of the Blue Pearl is not super­sti­tious. It is the Magical Power to see through illusion.
Once our Blue Pearl conscious­ness is aroused, so too is our own magical poten­tial. We can mani­fest what we need into our lives — health, wealth, happiness.
All Divine Masters have Magical Power. We don’t recog­nize ourselves. But the Divine Masters recog­nize our magical Inner Nature – our Enlightenment.
Be open to the Magic; it reminds us of who we really are.
The Blue Pearl comes from Emptiness.
Empti­ness is beyond the 3 dimen­sions. Empti­ness is the essence of every­thing we can see, hear, smell, taste and touch. Empti­ness is form and form is emptiness.
This is the highest wisdom. When you really know this, there are no longer walls or obsta­cles. This is Freedom.  This is Enlightenment.
Most of us have a purpose – always searching, always wanting some­thing. We don’t like the term empti­ness. We prefer abun­dance — but this is illusion.
There should be no wanting. Between each inhale and each exhale is Empti­ness. And in that moment a drop of the “nectar of being” can enter our conscious­ness, revealing that Empti­ness is Abundance.
Today, the Black Dragon and White Dragon of the prophecy are strug­gling, and like the posi­tive dragon, the nega­tive dragon has a Divine Nature as well. The essence of both is the Blue Pearl. We too, have both dragon ener­gies inside us, and the Blue Pearl deep in our heart.
Now is our time to surrender to the awak­ened Blue Pearl – the jewel of Enlightenment – balance the ener­gies, raise our aware­ness, become One with the Divine Mother and help heal the world.
Guan Yin holds the Blue Pearl in her hands.
The Phoenix holds the Blue Pearl in its beak.
We hold the Blue Pearl in our hearts.
Om Mani Padme Hum
A long time ago, the Divine Mother, Guan Shi Yin Pu Sa, the Bodhisattva of Compas­sion, observed and heard the “cries of the world.” Assuming her male form — Aval­okite­shava in Sanskrit, Chen­rezig in Tibetan – she paid a visit to the Himalayan Moun­tains. There, in the Land Of Snows, she gave the people of the world a precious gift – her sacred magical sounds, her heart sutra – “Om Mani Padme Hum.”
She promised her “chil­dren”, “If you hold my heart mantra in your heart, you will always be in my vibra­tion, you will always be connected to me and you will always have my blessings.”
In the mantra “Om Mani Padme Hum” – which means “the precious jewel atop the lotus” – “Mani” is the precious jewel and “Pedme” is the lotus.
The Blue Pearl is this precious jewel – the “Mani.” Within it is the compas­sion and wisdom of Guan Yin. It is also a metaphor for all the esoteric teachings.
Here in the West, it is a different kind of “money” that is the most precious. We often hear the mantra, “Oh money buy me a home.” Would we not be better served counting our bless­ings rather than our money?
The lotus is a metaphor for the exoteric teachings of Enlightenment.
Why is the lotus consid­ered a holy flower? The reason is because it grows out of the mud. Mud is a metaphor for our world. Just as the peacock — the progeny of the Phoenix — has the ability to trans­form the poison seed that it eats into the beauty of its magnif­i­cent plumage, so too, the Blue Pearl can trans­form the “mud” of the world into the beauty of the lotus for all sentient beings.
“Om Mani Padme Hum” beseeches us to fall in love with the mud, to fall in love with the Blue Pearl. The way of the Blue Pearl is not the human way.
By reciting the mantra “Om Mani Padme Hum” every day, we are reminded that during these diffi­cult times, we must shed our fear, our anger, our doubt and our judg­ment. We must remain calm in the face of disaster, and mani­fest the quality of the lotus, emerging from the mud pure and without stain.
The 21st Century is the century of the Divine Mother. It is the time when the femi­nine energy of Enlightenment will assert itself throughout the world.
A tran­scen­dent Master of the Dakini lineage once imparted the following wisdom to her beloved granddaughter:
“Life throws rough circum­stances towards us, and only wisdom can resolve their meaning. When we are tested by Heaven, there is a reason. Whether we can view each obstacle as a blessing, whether every “bad” person we encounter is a messenger, depends on whether our hearts are with the Dao, and whether our love truly reaches high and deep. We can retrieve some­thing worth­while out of karma, but only if we make offer­ings in spirit, even to forces we perceive as nega­tive. We should give thanks for the wonderful oppor­tu­nity to be tested, which enables us to develop patience and compassion.”
It is a common misun­der­standing to think that when we recite her mantra, we glorify Guan Yin. Rather, it is Guan Yin who glori­fies us – the precious Blue Pearl inside each one of us – our true Inner Nature, our Enlightenment.
“Om Mani Padme Hum.”

The Movie ...

and the name of the movie .... remains your luck if you find it...

is your destiny :)


Here is the most significant comment
i had to share :

a guy said it...
it says once translated :

"I was so affected by it, i cried in every line , every scene the acting . . .the story really brings me a damage . . i cant eat coz the maybe one of the essence is Love .. I really recognize both actors ... they're both great and lovely of their roles and the way they performed .. ."

Magic Love part 2

and how could i forget to tell this
am sure most viewers had not even notice it in the last scene
from all the feedback i read

but you see
all through out the movie
a plant was either drying out or blooming

and this plant/tree
was reflecting the actual
Life in the person

was the person inner Life healthy or not?

meaning reflecting the health of
the inner Tree of Life

....

and in the very last scene
the couple was surrounded by thriving plants and trees of the same specy

so actually...
all the way they took care of that tiny square of vegetation in their loft

and by the end
they were SURROUNDED and shaded by these very blossomed trees and vegetation

so much that they were the ones
whom the trees were actually taking care of

because
they were now that tiny square surrounded by the trees and vegetation

while in the beginning
they were the ones taking care of that tiny square of vegetation

awesome zoom in and out

incredible movie
really

and even more feeling warm
from knowing that it exists

in the consciousness of the initial writer
and even more incredible was grasped so fully
by the very video maker

and all the team

for is not easy to share this stuff
and make all go in this direction

and then the viewers

not all get it all the way

but to the least most of them surely loved it

MAGIC LOVE

This movie was THE hymn to seeing Life in the other

in it it was shown
how average couple last not
or even best friendship last not

cause people see not the very PERSON

but they see Money in her or him
or they see FAME and think they will get showered by their nearness
by their Glory and gain it themselves

anyway they see expectation in the other person
and how they can benefit you

is like a girl i knew
as soon as she knew someone was "important"
had fame or was about to marry
she used to stick to that person
to prepare the "land" for the future
so that she has the best seat in the first row in that person life

and get the glory showered on her
or the light of that occasion

see?

that is a calculated behavior
thinking light and love and LIFE is out of you
securing some interest and seat
by all means and "acts of (interested) generosity"

so at some point
i lied to people around
and pretended to have no job nor money
anyway i pretended to be in a lesser state

just to see how they actually are seeing me

and they were not seeing anything
except their own interest in the other person

likewise lately
they came all with sweet words

"i love your stubborness, humor and love,
may be a mix of all that"

and as soon as i started to use this very humor
to play the very person and tease her about her bisexuality

or the spy-der-man lol
about his hidden calculation
to draw back the muslim in advertising their cult

where all their attraction to my love and humor went?
all down the drain

because was empty words
one was seeking me out of curiosity the bisexual one
wanted to see where i live, am i married, what i do
am i sad or happy
sad is better like this she can enjoy it more
people are sadistic especially women to women

the guy,
wanted to manipulate
to get back a muslim in his group
to be able to better advertise his cult

that is what is interest
is an image you have of the person
and you want that image to reasssure yourself
and bring yourself up

thinking is glorious to receive other's light
is not

and as soon as i teased jokingly her bisexual ass

the true words
that her hearts were harboring
came out

"i understand why yogi rejected you"

that made me laugh when i read it
i said hmm.. not 5min before she forgot the love and humor she / they claimed to love in me

it was just a balm they were putting over me
thinking let's pat her as she wishes
and we got her

string of invisble manipulation
that can't EVER work with me

cause
thanks to God Grace
i am ABOVE them
so don't they think i can see them?

anyway,
out of SHEER luck i saw that movie

and in it

two people met
and they ONLY saw LIFE in each other

amazingly the scriptwriter and movie maker
managed to show

how each minute is like the last
and its value is even more priceless
when you -at the same time- ever have present in your mind
the running out of time and yet its ability to contains true Love for Life

and time in itself is not enough to Love

again the actors were infused with this philosophy
their acting were so great
that i would equal it to real

and then their great quality to pass through their eyes
the appreciation of life they were seeing in each other

made me realise
that as a realised person if we manage first to see our OWN self
like this through this thoughtless awareness

which after 10 of years of practice or 30 year of practice
no yogi in paris managed
even less in a permanent way

that is
to see in himself the Life itself

imagine
when you can ALSO see the Life in the other?
and not the image of that person that your self interest made

and now imagine
if both could see themselves AND each other
for that VERY life in them

don't you feel
is a whole NEW level of EXPERIENCING LIFE?

that has nothing to do
with the average man and woman , friend or lover

that has to do with Life itself
and THAT is MAGIC LOVE

Amazing Script writer beauty

What to say
i have watched such a BEAUTIFUL movie ...

i don't even dare to name it..just to keep it a bit longer in myself..

is just so beautiful

the script writer must be an alien? someone otherworldly? a time traveller?
i don't know
let me dream a bit longer

the actors, the main lead male and female
awesomely true

and the content..so deeeeeeeeeeep and spiritual

and the character so opposite and yet melting in each other
like day and night to make it a whole day

the music
and soundtrack .. especially one or two instrumentals
so nice, it seems they are there to touch the string of your soul
to make it arise

is another movie
i cried for .. remember i hardly ever cry for movies

except for Interstellar and a bit less but still for Cloud Atlas

but that movie is another Level

if i cried for Interstellar and Cloud Atlas
was for the pain the main lead was inspiring
like the cry of his soul for the Truth

but as i said that movie is another Level
i cried for its content
because it was just SO true

and i cried
because it was for the FIRST time
i saw it in "real" life
out of myself

so that i could say
"ah so it DOES exist"

i cried cause it was like a mirror
of myself
of my own appreciation for Life

i don't have the right words for now

plus this movie
is just as deep as i am used to express myself
contentwise i would say is the number one movie

now, you ask
but what is this movie?

well..Joker..this time
is my movie and i keep it
in me

...a bit more longer

and i really think i have to buy it
and to watch it at will

i never watch twice a movie

EXCEPT this one
because the actors emanate such a nice vibes in their role
that you feel the roles are real
i felt infused with their aura/acting

is a FIRST
for a movie
i tell you


plus
you feel such a nearness
closeness

is as i had said
it feels like

i am taking in ALL THE BEAUTY of this movie i am seeing
TAKING IT ALL IN ME

and then
it feels like
NO IT JUST UNCOVER IN ME THAT VERY BEAUTY
WHICH WAS ALREADY PRESENT

BUT THAT MOVIE
ACTED LIKE A MIRROR
FOR ME TO SEE IT

cause i think
the soul
just wishes to see itself
in the other

but the other
does not have that space
to share with you

except for my best friend

but i would say
even the yogi i met
though they are blessed
by this "space" / thoughtless awareness

they don't see its value
cause it is a FREE space
they don't know how to use it as a mirror
to see others beauty

and see that the other beauty
is your OWN beauty

this is why i say
when i watch this movie
i feel is my own beauty i am seeing...

so do i feel so with any amazing beauty
i see in the other
cause i don't feel it is a loss to me

as people do
and end up feeling jealous and envious

jealousy is an immature gross feeling
which shows
that you have not yet sorted out
that this beauty you are seeing in someone
it is all YOU, all in you after all

i think i definitely have to go for movie making
and i dream to meet such script writer
and work with them

is powerful
to meet such AUTHENTIC SOULS

....about souls

i am much more since two weeks in touch with my own soul
and that is communicatively speaking

 like today
once i finished meditation
and take a deep breath from belly
i let me soul give me any message it has for me

cause i said to it :)
now that is your space
i meditated
is now or never if you want to give a message

cause you see?
we have a soul
our part of authentic Self
which just happens to wish to move its way back to the Source

and it just wait to be listened to

but we don't

we just listen to our remnants thoughts
and we reproduce MORE THAN 93% of them everyday
cause
if i am not mistaken
the habits are stored in our cortex
and we just reiterate them
like robots

is so sorry
not to really live the Life

am sure
there is a smoother and more fuller way to live Life

people ask
if i have found what i am seeking...

rather they should ask themselves
if they dare to seek something better?
cause they think they "arrived" and reached their destination

but self realisation (like as in having some kundalini strands awakened)
is just an entrance door
to something greater

how could it be all that is?
this is how religions went wrong,
and this is how cults are born

is like mixing up the means with the purpose of life

and thereby
missing out so much more possibilities
to live, and breath in a more FULLER & more beautiful Life

which will become
actually
the beautiful Realm

that eyes have never seen
and ears have never heard of

where you would live in..
Petals

Spirit and Yogi..

Do you know what is shaitan or demons?

Or why some mind games exist
saying if God exist, then why he created a devil , if he is so good?
all many kinds of mind challenges like that exist

especially set by atheist people
but they are good
cause they force sincere seeker to think about
the duality of life

this topic is for other time

now,
i had a dream
where i was with the yogi
and the spirit was witnessing the actions of everyone

then as i talked to the Spirit
he got angry by their behavior

instead asked all of us
to compete
the swimming pool was so unclean
(swimming pool water is your own water,
your own purification
as to how much you practised purification
here using Shakti - if unclean means you are in want of purification)

so as swimming pool of theirs
was unclean
i went to another
brand new all clean

and they on their side competed
and i competed on my own
and then spirit call us both as group

and i happened to be the winner
even breaking some world record

then Spirit told me

"do they think I will be happy
with their low magic of paper burning
and burning shakti?"

"they considered you only as low muslim"

"it is ME who knows if you have value or not
NOT them"

"so do not believe their lies"

i can tell the even tiniest unease i was feeling
i had it no more
as it is like a dead rope linking me to them
was broken
and they could no more affect me
with their low mentality

instead

they are now reaping their deeds..

Remembering who I am

Had a nice dream life lol
today in dream i was seeing much of
my past life and a bit of my future life

was very much real

even seeing the names i had in my past

i find it cool
hehehe
cause i can google it
and i find those names
hey it feeds my curiosity


but the best of best
was when i was told

'she is recovering her memory
and know who she is"

that is the best part
cause the true memory and ID
is you being the Spirit as true nature
and not some past lives

but when you are recovering your memory
about who you are
as Spirit

then in the process
you DO start remembering also
the stored experience of your past lives

as you are recycled into creation
see? (unless enlightened)

:) i am remembering...who I am :)
so happy!!!

Take Responsibility

Lol
i have a friend
she is real positive about life

it is how i call
being in CHARGE

taking responsibility and not pity yourself

she used to get fired by all her bosses
instead look at the brightness of her mind

she said, "I fired my boss"

THAT i call it LIFE

cause she did not get STUCK in what "other are doing to her"
instead this denotes

that she LOOKED at the situation
SAW what she likes not
and ADMIT IT to herself

and then in a split of a second
decided in her self

"hey if that boss is so unethical
then, why would i feel to be victim of his firing?

it is ME who out of WILL fire him from my life"

see?

cause we CHOOSE on which value we live our life

now... if she was confused in her mind
knowing that he is unethical and yet feeling low for being fired

that confusion
would have shown her lack of maturity
in recognising with clarity of what is GOOD and BAD according to her standard

see?

so first be CLEAR about your standards
and then FIRE people out of your life
when you see they are crossing bounds of decency

this is how you do your share
second, wish the best for them
i always wish for them to "get it"
but i can't change people

yet..i wish for them what i wish for myself
and that is THE BEST EVOLUTION possible

may you become your TRUE SELF
Honest and Sincere
and may you meditate in morning

cause mind is limited
but the desire is not
the more you have the pure desire to wish for something BETTER for yourself

the more ... God provides for you
UNLIMITED RESSOURCES TO TAP FROM

is like me
i went blindly in life
refusing all kinds of "material" opportunity
be it job in best companies or even proposals from millionaire guys

cause these "events/scenario of future life" had no LIGHT in them
when i considered them
i could not SEE myself SHINING in such situation

yet...considering the UNKNOWN
i could feel the LIMITLESS POSSIBILITY
TO BE SOMETHING MORE THAN I HAVE NEVER BEEN

...and that is a GREAT excitement to discover/live Life

and now, when i dwell on this
i feel very much appreciative of what is happening to me

though at times is stressful
cause there is a mismatch between this world and spiritual standards

but at least
i know i have the chance to explore the infinite

is like something i feel in myself
i can touch it
but am still, for now, not able to see it
but it feels great
like the excitement you may have when you near it

it feels like a golden ball of light
inside of me

Everlasting Beauty

There are moments in life
where you realise
that everything is a teacher

actually most of time
i could say i can see myself learning
is like the teacher is an event, or even a movie

which are speaking to me

it is like it was customised
and created to answer to my questions
see?

Remember?
when i wrote once
about a TV commercial
when i switched on tv
it was answering my very question
i had in mind about some coffee brand


now, is same
during the day
there were a LINE of events
one after the other
that were -LITERALLY speaking- talking to me

an outsider would think is just an independent conversation
that i am witnessing between two people

but in truth
in my self
i felt as if both people
were answering to my questions
without them knowing it consciously

is an amazing feeling of closeness

moreover
it was like they were acting my own life
was so strange
cause most of the details were matching my life
and as the conversation was very deep

it was 100% customised for me

Purposely i am not going into the details of it

but i could feel a very warm feeling
in the belly
and it rose up till the heart

and i felt satisfied
it made me feel also more grounded
and peaceful

because it is like an outer confirmation
of what i was feeling inside
and it felt warm to know that
if someone else could put words to it

then it already exist
and if it exists then is beautiful to witness

because i always felt
that if i can witness beauty
then i would feel real rich inside

as if i am somehow collecting it in me
and it won't perish
or as if it is stored forever in me
or as if i lived it for REAL 
i.e. lived it and KNOWING that i am living it

(cause most of time
we live without knowing consciously that we are living a life
is like we live a life unconsciously
that does not leave in you a feeling of sth alive
rather it is empty from Life , is  neutral at best
it does not add to your experience/i.e. it does not nourish you)

and this creates a feeling of satisfaction
or of fulfillment

because i KNOW this Beauty exists
and i am witnessing it
and if i am witnessing it
then it is in me
and it is for me
stored for ever
in me

Sincerity & Honesty

my soul

i dig in people to find some treasure

and all i see is deception

most people are so blind to themselves

that you can never touch them

you can never touch their sincerity

is like no one wants to be his Self

always something else

i feel the true self is found in the very moment

yet, people, it seems, refuse to live the very moment

cause they are using the moment to plan for future

but it is in the very moment

that you can see each other's soul light

not after

after is sheer luck if you meet her again

and even if you were to meet her

you would have forgotten that she has a soul

to be appreciated for

because you would be even more engrossed

in planning for reaching your target

so you will plan even more

thinking is closer

and get even more blind

to the present

so much that you will never see 

the very blessed moment

in the person

in front of you 

this is why you always miss sincerity

though sincerity is ever present 

in front of you

you see her not

Lyrics 

BILLY JOEL LYRICS

"Honesty"

If you search for tenderness
It isn't hard to find
You can have the love you need to live
But if you look for truthfulness
You might just as well be blind
It always seems to be so hard to give

Honesty is such a lonely word
Everyone is so untrue
Honesty is hardly ever heard
And mostly what I need from you

I can always find someone
To say they sympathize
If I wear my heart out on my sleeve
But I don't want some pretty face
To tell me pretty lies
All I want is someone to believe

Honesty is such a lonely word
Everyone is so untrue
Honesty is hardly ever heard
And mostly what I need from you

I can find a lover
I can find a friend
I can have security
Until the bitter end
Anyone can comfort me
With promises again
I know, I know

When I'm deep inside of me
Don't be too concerned
I won't ask for nothin' while I'm gone
But when I want sincerity
Tell me where else can I turn
Cause you're the one that I depend upon

Honesty is such a lonely word
Everyone is so untrue
Honesty is hardly ever heard
And mostly what I need from you 

  

source : http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/billyjoel/honesty.html

Belly and the Joy

When you have that warm feeling
that arises from inside your belly
and it goes and touches heart

then you can bet
that you are doing something
that your soul is appreciating

cause is a feeling of joy
that arises straight
and touches your heart
which is the place of Love

and thus you are doing
what your soul Loves..

that is the very nice feeling
of excitement
and being at the right place
and doing the right thing

then it feels like
you are breathing anew

Luxurious moment of Light

ahhhhhh!
Have just been invited for a LUXURIOUS bath time
Warm water ... mixed with Lavender essence

just ONE word
GLORIOUS

Eager to be Monday!!!

okay am hesitating between
a Verbena, Lavender or Jasmin ...

these are such AUTHENTIC essences
i think i will go for Lavender

now,
i had a very nice AHA moment of clarity

was about the Light coming out of fingers

As i got reminded
the fingers show you the state of your chakras
but it had NEVER occured to me ON THE SPOT
that DE FACTO the fingers were the EXTENSION of my chakras see?

and i mean it LITERALLY SPEAKING
not as in descriptive way

this is WHY  i can see LIGHT going out of it
cause it SHOWS the DEGREE of SELF REALISATION
more explicitely is the LIGHT of the SPIRIT
that has PASSED THROUGH THE chakra of the person
it ENLIGHTENED SO MUCH the chakras
that the LIGHT was GOING OUT of the fingers

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
then i felt it was AWESOME
the LIGHT OF THE SPIRIT i could see out of these VERY fingers
isn't it AMAZING?

you can see YOUR OWN spirit LIGHT!!!

AWESOME



Hope i can activate that one day at will
this will be ONLY when it will become stable i guess
a state
that's a beautiful experience

kiss and love:x:x:x

Collective bandhan ... and their paper burning

Yogi never understand
what it means to put attention within
always trying to purify others behavior and never theirs, right?

After doing some mischievousness
of course they think EVIL is outside of them

never knowing it is to be fixed within.

So after calling a collective bandan
where they are calling me "back to mataji"

Mataji is what?
is not the Adi Shakti within?
you think i left my own adi shakti within?

no... they just want to control you, the outside
by misusing bandhan/magic...

cause they want me
the GOOD muslim
to be "BACK" to what they call collectivity

Should i call them back to the sufi realised collectivity?
hmm? that they never entered?
is stupid cause a collectivity is spiritual
is not a concrete stuff just because you have a group
what they are is a "GROUP" of numbnuts not meditating
though they are many

so they were curious about me
thinking : she left mataji, she left the collectivity

i will straighten for the LAST TIME their twisted mind :
still i love them, they are like ignorant kids

see?

1- Mataji is not a person, is not God
2- Adi shakti is WITHIN, you can't leave your own SELF , as your OWN SPIRIT WITHIN IS GOD
3- if you meditate NOT , and i DO EVERY MORNING, you will get affected
and i saw , except one yogi living in their ashram who is actually the only good one, and people think she is stupid, doing well

all of the others, are just going backward in their opening of petals
lol
they have never ever thought about that i bet! the opening ...or closing off... of their petals..

4- Guys, still not getting it? where my spiritual power comes from?
may be from my petals opening? cause i meditate my ass in the morning?
if so, i left nothing? may be except your stupid group of overarching patronizing controllers?

5-instead of behaving like an indian cast
following some guy who has no discriminative power
except sticking to mataji family title
what if I START behaving as stupidly as them, under pretext i am the GRAND....GRAND daughter
of FATIMA?

HMM?

back to earth guys
care for your own practice and meditation
then see if your petals open
so far they are rather drying out

and expect the consequences of your deeds


6- they never learn to appreciate the person for WHO THEY ARE
had they? they would have seen where my wisdom was flowing from
instead of asking me to be less deep...pure jealousy

so why they are afraid of my power?
while they had all the way seen them when i was benefiting them with ?
cause they NEVER took it for their OWN benefit
they ONLY saw YEA IS GREAT
GREAT to use her to BRING BACK OTHER MUSLIMS to worship indian god in sari
and make some dance after roasting some rice in chimney called havan

you think muslims are stupid and to be educated?

there are REALISED SUFI
with POWER of SPIRIT

and when they met me
they thought
ah! a muslim she never meditates
she is so numbnuts
let her use her for attracting others

NEVER EVER THINKING
OR EVEN YET WONDERING
WHERE I HAVE THESE SPIRITUAL POWER FROM
hmm?

May be because i am a REGULAR MEDITATOR
may be because the LAST ONES ARE THE FIRST?

May be i got self realisation later than them
but am ALREADY LEADING THE WAY

as of this DAY
they will have NO MORE muslims in paris
they are not entitled to respect,
they don't know to keep a meditational practice
only bothering by turning muslims into some pujadists hahaha

they are just stuck in marketing
thinking to work for the Glory of some Mataji
while all the way mataji only ask them to IMPROVE THEIR SLACKING MEDITATION
INEXISTANT PRACTICE IN MORNING?

once you do it
then muslims will follow
but this they will never get

and for the prank
they have activated protection i have from Mataji
and each single person having taken part in it
will have to BEAR the consequences of their INTENTION

Good intention, you reap goods
bad intention, you reap bad
that is the POWER OF INNOCENCE

capish?
let's see and wait your lot..

is me who should do a bandhan for you to get your practice right
mediate in morning! and you will see something else above your limited bandhan

and yea, the paper burning...
you are not burning the person ...
you are burning the NEGATIVE vision YOU HAVE INSIDE YOU OF HER

so at BEST this paper burning will make you to love me more?
not sure it will last though
but it can't destroy my so called "negativity" if i don't have any such as THEY thought me having abandoned meditation lol? as i NEVER abandoned it... but this too they will never get it...

and a bandhan can't bring me back, cause i NEVER left?

SEE? cause all the WAY you thought WRONG direction


is ok no more muslim for them in paris
seeking Glory out of themselves hmm?
only, when i see SINCERITY and PRACTICE in them
then they will see GROUPS OF MUSLIMS BY THOUSANDS coming for self realisation

TILL THEN
if the leaders are not ready
NOTHING

and.....mediate ....dear
numbnuts you are ... good at least you made me laugh
don't tire your hands too much with bandhans

with love,
kiss:x

Kid Mommy and Kundalini

Had to blog this
i was shopping in a Mart
and 3 times i happen to cross a path with babies or kids
and each time they stopped talking
and started to look on top of my head

how i know?
cause i looked at their eye balls gosh!

anyway
the last kid was the youngest
and she was crying so loud
actually i was so engrossed in my shopping spree
had not even paid attention to her


but i came near to grab my shower gel
:))
she stopped screaming
i thought "ah suddenly is pleasant"
and looked around and saw her

then she bent her head all the way back
and was looking at me
and her eyes went half closed
and then she said "mommy"

wow
that is FIRST time i saw a person melting
really
i had heard of it
that once your kundalini is strongly awakened
it "melt" the person next to you
but on a kid was even more obvious!

really she went soft like a cotton
or a wool pillow
hahaha
don't ask me why i say that
but is like when you are extremely tired
and you feel this extasy of jumping into the most comfy pillow on your large bed!
well was same

so i patted myself
and said yea! indeed
is my kundalini!

first i thought the kid swooned or fainted
hahaha
so abnormal it was

plus really
calling the energy she was saying "Mommy"
was just amazing
that it hit me
i said to myself
"AT LAST someone sees it! of course only kids do"

the kids see what we see not
and they see the Kingdom or Heaven on Earth

kiss:x!

Mastery

spirituality is a dangerous place to be
cause never i saw ANYONE give something
for the sake of God

always some retribution is demanded
one way or another
be SURE it will be demanded

some ask for sex
others for money
others for both lol

stuff is i know myself
when i help someone i do it from my own inner generosity
and that is called compassion

so when you lie to someone
what you do?
you steal him his free will see?

cause you expect him
to obey to you
and as you have doubts he won't
you use lies
and as is presented as truth
the person will agree while being ignorant

this is how lies
help you to bypass his free will

when i was seeking spirituality
i saw how i could be as muslim be slowed down
in my process to find truth

so i ask for guidance from God
to learn truth from non muslim base
cause you see i knew truth is not about religion
but about its very Essence

and religion was slowing me down

but if is undeniable that muslims / or any religious group
that you belong to
put loads of its conditioning on you
and slow down your enlightenment process

a non muslim / or non religious group
has the defect of having no more deep rooted ethics
they will do as their ass wants

the sacredness and nearness thingy
that you find in any religious group is lost
the behavior is just messy, and most of time based on lies
to bypass your free will
and make you adhere to it

that is just a non religious form of controlling

cause ANY being
be he enlightened or not

will at some point
wants to chiselled you to his image
and stomp the beauty of your sincere offering for that path

manipulation is used when you know you can't get it by saying truth
so you lie to bypass the other's free will

see?
Free will is to have the freedom to choose
but if facts presented to you are deformed so that you be more willing to believe in them
isn't it harming your free will?

it is.
so whatever happen
just know

that you can rely ONLY on your own soul

cause most women out of jealousy will not help you
and most men will only be interested for their ego for you to serve
so if you want freedom
just cease to seek a master out of you
cause they are all fake.

if you seek to seek one outside?
where you find mastery?
through your Master Within.

Buddah India and DNA

i had visions just in the first minutes when i started meditation this morning

in the beginning, i saw a Budda sitting over branch of a tree under the night sky and behind him i saw a silver moon, very huge
the silver moon was really beautiful

and then i got another vision
so real
i saw as if i was in India and was visiting some poor quarters or so
and people there
though they were utterly poor
they were so generous cause they built a HUGE cup for me
a sort of vessel that can carry water
was hand made , like they had melted the metal to create it
and i could see thick nails planted in sort of metal ribbons decorating the huge vessel
actually it was so huge it could fill up the square or a market place

and i was surprised they made me that gift for me
while they were poor and had nothing for themselves
was really truly generous behavior 


and in the third vision i saw the color blue and orange from DNA
then i saw these blue and orange bits of DNA exploding


and then i saw the energy going out of the body
and it is how it started to affect life around
 
 
i wondered if  dna orange and blue color?
actuallty yes...to my surprise it is ..

cause DNA is based on 4 proteins chains 2 are orange..2 blue
the re-arrangement of them as adbc..creates the life dna..etc
in billion combinations

anyway..there are only 4 proteins in the dna
which are creating life
in different combinations..etc
of them 2 are blue..2 are orange like in my vision and when they exploded energies went out of it like light  and it affected the atmospher around

the whole vision liberated a good feel...

had to blog it

Hellish realm

In last post was about witnessing
reincarnation from the Above, like from Heaven

that time i had since people who were stuck in hell
brrr...have goosebump so disgraceful it was

first of all their bodies were disgraceful

i think as a human being
we have a real Graceful body
so well balanced and really graceful

in there
i saw it was like midnight time
and the people stuck there
were trying HARD to get out of their realm

so in a way everyone tries hard
to get out of his condition
to get a better life

but trying hard
in the wrong way
leads to nowhere
is like you are stuck
and is really desperate situation

and that is hell

the guys i saw they had only
legs and their body ended up hardly on the navel
very little of backbone

and their legs were up
while trying very HARD to grow something
by pushing even more on their "what remained of their" belly

ah...what to say?
was disgraceful
and i saw so much effort but to no avail

was like sport club?
so much smelly by the men's effort

their body was so disgraceful
cause it was just half..

i just wanted to see no more of it

then i saw the  female
and i saw they had their body
but their hellish level was due to the fact
they were so BAD behaved in groups among female..

and it reflects reality
the girls i knew in the yogi group
they were like schizo?
so well behave in their own company
and so bad mannered when in group
so badly using their power really

knew not that one had one behavior in group
and another when alone
that is to their disadvantage this backbiting in female group
brr.. really not good to see

and Spirit told me
that these men
were actually with their soul separated from the spirit

it made sense...

soul is in belly
which they had
but the higher part of their body was missing
which was where the spirit dwell
in the heart till its evolution on top of head

so yes was really sad to see how hard they were trying

and really to no avail
and again i say it
such a disgraceful body..

a human being should realise he has a really pretty
and graceful body as it is

then i saw and felt
well actually i lived it
how once one dies
it goes through the underword i saw
like central of earth
through an energy vortex actually
and pop OUT on the other side of the earth
through the vortex

and it is how it is an eternal cycle
while for the luckier it is so
for those who are stuck in hell
they are stuck for a long time
cause they can't like go out of it and reincarnate

so i realised that death is not like the end
is not like people who commit suicide
or even at time of dying think
in a glamorous way about another new life
while getting rid of their current life issues
no at all
is just worse actually

cause at least in this life you have your memory
and the blessing of a FULL graceful body
and if you are lucky your awakened kundalini to purify yourself

while knowing that even yogi can get stuck and become demon
as i witness it if they remain stuck in some realm once they die
cause what counts is your state when you die
on that very moment

the state of you when you die
is written in all scriptures
conditions the realm where you wake up