So many blessings

ah so cool
this morning i woke up to meditate
and by the end of it
i felt a real rain
lol remember the 'wet' rain
on the back of my right heart chakra

hmm:)
i love it
it IS rain lol

now,
the day before
i was having a phone call
and while standing
just prior to it
during and after it

i was receiving
literally speaking
buckets of cool vibes

as if someone was throwin them at me
from the ground upward on the feet

then i felt another on the chest area

and the last one on top of head

this time was no cool breeze felt from within without
it was as i wrote as if a presence was throwing it on me

for at someone when i referred to this presence
while being on the phone
another all of a sudden bucket was thrown onto my heart and chest

that i literally said on the spot
ok i am not afraid but certainly am astonished and caught offguard


and i went to sleep wondering who was throwing those buckets of cool vibes to me

and i dreamt
as if was a real life moment
that i was reliving the scene of this phone call standing
and in my room a woman entered
she was all black

and as i got afraid of a presence behind me
opening my door and entering
she apologised
and i told her no is all ok
no harm only surprised

and then she praised me
for being such a formidable girl


and she gave me her name twice
for lol i could not pronounce it correctly
at the third time she had lol to spell it
and finally it happened that i still can't

anyway,
she told me she was the western version
of Kali

:)

after the dream i was living my day
with such powerful and happy mood
that i just had to thank her and accept her blessings :x
so that they fade not away :x


ah, yes
lately a yogi died
he was very advanced
but got stuck at his death time
on agnya and right vishuddhi especially
otherwise all of his right channel was messed up

people said, other yogis too that he died with smile on his face
these are apparences
reality was all other
for where was his smile there:

he was stuck in the limbo
the barzak in the islamic wording
due to his citta being stuck at death time
as i wrote a para about above

so see?
what matter is
as said in hadith
how you die

the state in which you die
is the state in which you will arise
after death

there are many details
i would like to note here
but worth not

for now at least

so first and foremost
i thank my beautiful God
to let me know such stuff
for this is real stuff

and i am so happy
that i am getting poetic lol
gotta write him/her a poem for that :x

anyway
he was trying to catch the attention
of others by moving and breaking stuff
he was very advance
this is why he could break heavy stuff

unless we helped it
without him wanting it
he could have become a demon
this is how demons exist

for demons
are oblivious to their inner God light
oblivious = darkness = power in darkness = demonic power

the ONLY thing to be done
was to get collectively
at least with 3 people
a meditation
by litting incense
WHILE litting it
dedicating it to him

why?
because no chit chat with death helps
they hear not in this case
only Images and emotions and smells they get
so incense reach them
images of this life is on the same as theirs
therefore they do not "realise"
their citta being in a semi-sleep state in barzak
that they are doing "evil"

but if they are not helped
their desperation to find help to pass over to light
may get them violently seeking for light
and even more grabbing the light giving stuff are made of...

which is soul of the individual living there...

anyway
as i knew that it is what was going to happen
and shit would have happened in this ashram of theirs
i literally went there
and grab two people to meditate with me

and dreamt after
that he passed over to the light
to a very high level astral plan
good for him
and good for them...

the poor guy
suffered a lot in this life

see?
whatever he did in this life
if people liked him not
they should have used love to let him know
see
if not working
then you let him
but criticise him not

criticising a dead person
is very bad
for he can haunt you for life

hence the ritual in all cultures and religions
the lowest being the wailing
to let the dead ones know "we care"

while the highest being "love"
but you can't send love
unless you have it
for such feelings after death
can't be fake
the dead ones know if you love them or not

i told you above
only images, scents and emotions reach them
try to fake love and they know it

so,
i dreamt he went away
happy and in peace.

in the past i would have felt sorrowful
why they did not meditate collectively
for i did my best 
to transmit them the right message
for his peace
and their own safety

but somehow
no one managed to gather at least 3 people in there
to relieve this soul and do it
other stuff have been used
except for the very thing to be done
meditation
with 3 people at least
with incense dedicated to him
sending of (real) love and vibes

that's all

but now
somehow
i am happy:)

for i am happy to have helped them
without them knowing that i saved at least
life of two people living there

for he was powerful
but was not doing "evil" on purpose
in his death realm
he thought we were also living on the same realm
so he was just trying to grab people attention
though he was very much desperate and getting angrier

the poor guy, i feel his sad heart may be,
anyway mine is getting heavy
mentioning it
for the lack of attention he received and true love.

best of deed
are deeds done as naturally as water flow
without much noise
for God sees you
and then he/she loves you more

so much that i had this above beautiful dream meeting
with such a great power of God itself

also,
as i was saying prior to it
i would have questioned myself long
as to the whys and nots of people not doing it

now,
i ended up feeling
like a river that flows
and over ride stones
that she meets in her way :)

is like
really i don't care
not in the negative sense
but in its importance ranking

priority for me are sincere people
the others are free to go on the chosen path of theirs
i am no more interested

so the not-happened/done stuff
are to some level of no more concern to me

had it been done
i would have rejoiced very much
and it would have open equally heavy door of blessings
to  them i feel
but is really beautiful to see
how by ONE deed one can miss buckets of blessings

you know why?
because in one deed
the WHOLE of universe can be expressed and contained
when it stems from the heart.

i am JUST understanding it now.

oh and my family member
dreamt of me having a baby
in a push chair
and the prophet muhammad peace be on him
taking it
and bring it up
and the baby was full of light

i think
the baby is only the symbolism
of the child/innocence in me

so i am happy again
to hear only good news from everywhere

today,
by the end of day
i saw after long time
a weirdo girl
lol i call her weirdo
for she behaves like an angel on one on one moment
and like a bhoot lol mwhahaha in circles of friend

for her eyes become black
and her tongue clap like no other talk active person
the poor she
well is the best i can say for her
for she just lack motherly love
hence she wants to fill herself up
with love from all people as much as she can get
bad thing is
she will be like an empty well
however effort she does
for she learns not to respect the other
as her self

as she told me
she plays the nice in front of people
to better manipulate them later
and she was plainly insulting them
behind their back in front of me

i was shocked to learn that
really
can such people exist?
for i can't understand how one can have
one face to them and another behind their back
is above me
unreachable
basically it means the person is betraying her own self
by being hypocrite to her own self
hence she can be so to others...

but is of no concern to me
i guess people get manipulated
for they want it too lol

so in brief
she does favor on people
to force their attention
to manipulate them...

such a looooooooooong calculation
God i am just tired of writing it lol


i gave up trying to help her
sincerity works only for those
who at least SAY they are or want to be sincere
for it is a claim that can be tested by God
but when you wish not for it
God leaves you in your shit lol
to say things plainly

for those who play double game
i just see it
all is in the eyes

and lol in the behavior too.

anyway,
i was very happy of my week end
for i had such a day filled with lovely meetings
as i said

be like a river flowing
over stones :)

kiss:x

ps: by the end of the day
i was holding a baby girl
she was so cute and nice
i raised her kundalini thrice and put it on her sahasrara
and turned her belly chakra

i heard her taking 3 small heavy breathes from it
and releasing it in her chest
and she, who was already so calm,
ended up peaceful

when she went back on the lap of her father
her eyes were FULL
beautiful

:x