Saturday 19 January 2013

Grace of God

when i was a child
and used to walk on grass
at some point i wondered may be i was hurting them with my weight
so i stepped aside

when i stepped aside i was standing on peebles
and thought i may be hurting them too

then i wondered : ) at this rate i will never be able to walk anywhere

so i gazed at the grass and at the peebles
as if i was inside them
and said to myself what if i could be them?
how would it feel like to see the world from the inside?

But once, in dream i saw that i was really a seed,
i was really a flower blooming
i was it as much as you could feel wind on your face
it was that real
i could see myself growing on a stem and swinging in the wind
as a fragile flower does.

Seeking certainty,
how could i one day say with certainty
that this way i am on is the Truth?
that this is my guarantee?

where would be the standard of purity that i would use for that?

Today, i remembered
that nature is where one feels good
all is good in nature
you don't even need a standard
because already surrounded by all goodness
that you do not need to discriminate
so what standards are for?

but when you live in a human made world
you need a standard to discriminate
that which is heavenly from that which is not.
why so?
because here everything is mixed up
every need
every level
every kind of profile and hunger for Life.

Because everyone is an individual (soul)
though he is part of the whole (spirit)

as you view Life, God (Al Hayy = The Living)
so will you serve Him.

In Truth God is not in need of "service"
He does not need you to "worship" Him
nor He is a God who wish to Trade
worship vs livelihood
to gain something for His Glory

this any believer would agree
yet, this is how most think of God
because their worries and their deeds speak for them
though their tongue may utter something else.

their tongue when it utters something else
is in a way calling them to try a new way
if you grasp it
then may be you may dig your way to this new vision of life
and make it grow

but if you come back to your sleep
and grow NOT in your way of viewing God possibilities to Give you
then you will remain stuck in this vision you have of Him.

Is it not said, I am as my servant imagine Me?
why not imagining a God different from giving us the role of a
Slave, or of a Tradesman ?


Imam Ali [as] said: Verily, some people worshipped Allah being desirous (Of His reward) – so this is the worship of traders; and some people worshipped Allah fearing (His punishment) – so it is the worship of slaves, and a group worshipped Allah in gratitude (to Him) so this is the worship of the free. (Nahju ‘I-balaghah) 

In our practical life, we prove by our desires, concerns of future and finally actions
How we think of Ar Rahman.

When i finished my studies
and looked ahead
i felt frightened 
because i was appalled
i saw my life like a routine
job, work, family, home
and start all over again 
generation after generation 
with the SAME concern.
then comes concern for children
and make them go through the same cycle:
study, work, competition
yes same pleasures here and there as well

but the pattern is same.

yet, 
we are individual
we have all our own set of joys
and according to your center of interest 
you will give all to it

of course if you want to have the role of establishing 
this routine 
then it is your joy and you go for it

but your children are not yours.
they are like the arrow on a bow
you help them accomplish their own joy as well

if you have the wish to live in that routine 
do it with joy
but do not see it as a burden 
where you should exchange and beg God for your survival
have some joyful and creative expectations
that the way to be given is not set in stone
and it could be given in a creative way to you
that you had not expected from Him.
why not?
like this you are not behaving like a slave to Him

Be a servant 
in the sense of turning your face to His 

Be a tradesman 
in the sense of giving your time and concern to Him
in exchange for a transformative way of viewing Life

finally, 
you view it with eyes filled with Love.

Love, no clue what it could be in a routine.
because we are always concern with timing and forms of the giving
never with the Grace with which it will be bestowed.

I am as my servants imagine Me.

Imagine your Lord without graceful ways
and see how your life will feel like.
Tense, with pressure and rough all the way till you get (or not) what you want.

it is not that people do not wish for Grace
it is that they do not expect it
so they do not imagine their God being so.
their vision is jailed in what their routine has taught them

so how to widen your vision?
how to purify it?
to clear it, 
so that you may see Grace?

may be by starting to meditate.

Today, 
for the first time i realised 
that indeed 
Certainty is tied to the witnessing of Grace.


Look at the rose opening : 



Is there any good or bad?
NO. 
because the process is heavenly 
not human.

Do you see any human hand opening the petals?
try to open them and you will damage the flower.

so if you open petals 
you do the "bad" thing. ok?

BUT 
if you Let the HAND of GOD 
to open the petals
they open with GRACE

it is an invisible Power, Hand
that opens it.
that is a Graceful Hand...

same is with a human being.
if you place yourself in this spot instead of the flower
and you LET this SAME power OPEN you
meaning, 
letting you BLOSSOM 
will you be hurt?
will you feel confused? 
will you try to say "wait, wait, that way is good, no that one is bad"?
it won't even occur to you to use your wit for it.
nor to give direction to God.

so what is this way of ignorance?
and placing it as a burden upon your own children?
of seeing the man-God relationship as separate?
or that in afterlife i will see Him...
that is so silly.

if He nourishes and opens a flower RIGHT NOW 
and TRANSFORM it with GRACE to a new life (yes after life) RIGHT NOW
THEN 
He can do same with me, with you, with ANYONE RIGHT NOW TOO!

what is religion except Love?
except having that religious, awesome feeling of being transformed
by the Hand of God?

could you SEE a Hand falling from heaven and opening the flower?
no. not according to your human physical way. 
meaning not as YOU would do.
come and open the flower with your bare hands.

but the Hand of God 
is the Pure Spirit
which is in your OWN heart

if you call upon it
feel it
and LET this very Gracious Power within 
MANIFEST itself
then you will BLOOM and BLOSSOM

with ease and Grace.
THAT is the promise of God.

He hold his promise for a "mere" flower
why won't it hold it for you?
while you have this acute consciousness of life at all level
you can perceive vegetal as well as animal forms
and other human forms...

so why on earth the SPIRIT won't serve your purpose of BEING?

why you have to close yourself up 
and your future generations as well
in that place where you imagine Him NOT to be?

"Has God forsaken this place?"
I love this quote. yes if you imagined Him having done so.

why you exile God to a far off Heaven?
while His Light is in you already?
why you CHOOSE not to feel it within?

NEVER God act against your desire.
Imagine Him forcing a petal to open?
NO, never.
instead, this would be the hand of man which will crash petals fine nervures
in order to open it.

in truth, 
the flower resists not, 
it, sort of,  "let go"
so that it may feel the spirit within her 
which knows when and how much she needs exact amount 
of sunlight, water, minerals to open
not more, not less, 
otherwise she may dry and die or get rotten and die

this spirit is your inside best well-wisher
you need to feel it to LET IT act
and THIS is Gracious guidance of your life
and in this there is no good, no bad
it just is.
because all different elements are gathered together for the flower to grow and open
they are all brought to a unity of purpose. 
where no one is less than the other
nor bad while others are better

while the transformation takes place
and the seed becomes a bud and then a flower.

it takes place RIGHT NOW and goes on, yes in an after life.

but isn't it above all wonderful?
that we have the SAME ability than the flower
to be honored by the Hand of God 
who will open us with Grace?

we JUST need 
to LET GO of all resistance
and submit
to the power of Grace within.

and THAT is the only certainty
that you can trust, indeed.